Question: I’m 17 and have been dating my boyfriend for two months. Last week, we found out that I’m pregnant.
He said he’ll drop out of school and go full-time at the grocery store he works at so that we can raise this baby together, but I’m not sure I’m ready to be a mom yet.
I just told my parents I’m pregnant. They’re furious and so disappointed in me. They told me they made an appointment for me to get an abortion. Can they make me get an abortion?
Answer: No one can make you get an abortion if you don’t want one. Abortion providers will only perform abortions for women who have decided to have one. Getting an abortion because your parents think you should might not actually be what’s right for you. You can learn from their advice, but you will have to decide what’s best for yourself. This is your baby and your choice, but abortion is the only choice that you can’t reverse.
You have a right to make important health and life choices. When you’re facing a pregnancy at such a young age, it’s common to feel like your life is out of whack. Take some time to think about what’s best for you and your baby.
Even as a teen mom, you have the choice over what happens to your baby. There are lots of things to think about before deciding to raise a child. Once you become a parent, you’ll be responsible for another person for at least the next 18 years. Raising a child requires major commitments in money and in time. Even with the help from family and friends, being a teen parent isn’t easy. It’s often frustrating and complicated. Their children may also have a more difficult time growing up.
Here are some questions to ask yourself before becoming a mom:
- Am I ready to give up my education and social life with my friends to take care of my baby?
- Will I make enough money to support myself and my child?
- Am I ready to accept responsibility for parenting, if it becomes necessary?
- Am I mature enough to avoid harming my child physically or emotionally?
- Am I ready to put my school and future career plans on hold?
Your parents can have tons of influence since they hold authority over you! Some people say that teens don’t have the physical and mental capacity to understand the results of their decisions. They believe that parents should have the legal right to force their children into a decision as they have the best interests of the child at heart. We suggest that you talk to your parents: will they kick you out if you didn’t get an abortion?
What About Adoption?
Finding out more info on open adoption is easy, and it’s a positive choice when raising a baby doesn’t seem like it’d work. Open adoption means that you can select the adoptive parents who will raise your baby. Your boyfriend can help you pick if he’d like to get involved too. Also, open adoption allows you to remain part of your child’s life as they grow up. Open adoption doesn’t mean “goodbye” forever; you can see your baby grow up through videos, emails, phone calls, texts, and visits. The choices are yours! With open adoption, you get to decide about future contact, who will raise your baby, and how things will go in the hospital when you deliver.
Adoption Agency Florida can give you info about the pregnancy choice of adoption. We’re also able to help you find the support you need in your local community.
Remember, you are not alone! Just call us at 1-877-383-6847.
This blog was originally published on July 28, 2016, and has since been updated.