If you’re in the midst of your adoption wait, the holidays can become a time of added pressure and disappointment. People close to you may mean well but ask questions or make remarks that seem insensitive.
If you’re hopeful adoptive parents waiting for a child, you might be wondering “How are we going to get through the holidays?” Today, Lifetime is sharing 5 tips on how to survive the holidays while in the adoption wait!
1. Talk About It
Trying to hold your emotions inside will only make you feel worse. So, think about talking to a close family member, friend, counselor, or your pastor about what you’re going through. It may be that simply talking about it will raise your spirits so that you can enjoy the holiday festivities.
2. Be Honest
You might be feeling guilty that you’re not happy when everyone around you seems to be in the holiday spirit. You see that people around you are cheerfully celebrating. If you’re feeling down, don’t try to suppress your emotions. Grant yourself permission to cry and be sad. It might help to jot your feelings down in a journal. Decline invites to holiday parties and dinners you’re not up to attending.
3. Do Something for Yourself
Practice some self-care if you’re feeling unhappy during the holidays. This could be a nice long massage, a weekly yoga class, or treating yourself to that pretty dress you’ve been admiring. By doing something for yourself, relaxing, and unwinding, you’ll be better able to handle the hectic holiday season. Everyone deserves a break to re-group every now and then.
4. Help Those in Need
Often, giving back can lift your spirits. There are so many ways to do this, so pick something that feels right to you. You could volunteer at a homeless shelter, donate toys or gifts to a family in need, or even just do something thoughtful for a friend, co-worker, or family member. Helping those in need will give you an amazing feeling!
5. Get Involved
When you’re feeling blue, getting involved in a project or activity may help. “When we were in the adoption wait, I put a fresh coat of paint and got new furniture for our guest bedroom. Doing all this allowed me something to think about other than how sad I felt. And, it paid off! My mom ended up staying in this guest room and helping me out during the very first days home with our newborn son,” shares one Lifetime adoptive mom. Getting involved doesn’t have to mean undertaking such a big project, though. It may be an activity as simple as baking, scrapbooking, knitting, organizing a closet, or making homemade gifts.
Remember, this too shall pass, no matter how you choose to get through the holiday season while you’re waiting to adopt. And you’ll be parents before you know it!
If you’re struggling with the adoption wait, know that it’s just a matter of time before a birth mother chooses you. During your adoption wait, you have time to learn what you can to get ready for parenthood. You’ll learn how the adoption process works and positive adoption language. You’ll consult with experts in the adoption field. Know that there will be good days and others filled with doubt and worry.
There’s a lot of waiting involved in the infant adoption process. First, there’s waiting for your home study to be completed, then there’s the waiting for a birth mother to choose to match with you. The adoption wait can seem extra tough, especially when it’s for something you so long for: to be parents.
Many hopeful adoptive couples find that the wait to be chosen by birth mother gets tedious, and even more so during the holiday season. To keep yourself and your spouse motivated during your adoption wait, we’re sharing 5 tips with you today:
