Image

Archive for Adoption for my child

How to Talk About Adoption With Your Baby’s Father

texting at nightLearning that you’re pregnant unexpectedly sure brings up a lot of emotions. You might be worried about how to tell your boyfriend you’re pregnant and thinking about adoption. You might be thinking about keeping your pregnancy a secret to him then keeping him in the dark about the adoption process. Today, we’re going to talk about why that’s not such a great idea.

When you’re making an adoption plan, it’s important to be honest with your baby’s father. But know that if you’re not comfortable with talking to him, Lifetime can help.

Some women worry that they won’t be able to choose adoption because of their baby’s father. Know that Lifetime can help you out, whatever your situation is. That includes if:

  • You aren’t sure who your baby’s father is
  • He’s in jail
  • You don’t know where he lives or what his name is
  • He isn’t open to the adoption
  • You’re married, but not to the baby’s father

You might be wondering how in the world you’ll tell him you’re pregnant. It seems like life would be easier if you kept your adoption plans a secret from him. Well, here’s 4 reasons why it’s a good idea to be honest with your baby’s father:

1. Your Child Will Know Their Birth Father

As they grow up, your child will wonder about his or her birth father. By identifying him now, you’re providing your child with this vital info they’ll be asking for in the future.

2. Gives Your Child a Medical History
The more background info that’s known for your child’s medical history, the better. They’ll need this medical history info throughout their life; just think of how often you’re asked for yours at the doctor’s office! By being honest with him about your adoption plans, he’s then able to share his family’s medical history too, allowing your child to have a completed medical history.

3. Allows the Adoption to Happen
We know it’s not easy to tell him you’re pregnant and are making an adoption plan. But it’s way better than him learning he’s a dad years down the road! So, make sure to be honest with him now.

If you need help telling him you’re pregnant, Lifetime can help you find the words. Or, you can rely on us to inform him of your adoption plans.

Some birth mothers work with their baby’s father at picking the adoptive family. If you’d like to learn more about working with him throughout the adoption planning process, check out: “Adoption Truth: Guys Can Be Involved, Too.”

4. Helps the Adoption Go Smoothly
By revealing his identity, his rights are recognized during the adoption. This helps your adoption plan happen more easily. If you’d like to learn about his rights, here’s a quick link: Birth Fathers’ Adoption Legal Rights.

7 Things to Know About Your Unplanned Pregnancy

positive pregnancy test? here's what you should know!Lots of us have been there: standing in line to pay for a pregnancy test. It doesn’t matter if the test is for a friend or a “friend,” it’s as if you can feel the panic in the air.

If you’ve just gotten a positive pregnancy test, you might be freaking out. Nothing in makes sense, and it’s like your stomach has fallen to your feet. You wake up the next few mornings with anxiety, realizing it wasn’t all a dream and you’re actually pregnant.

Here are 7 things to be aware of about your unplanned pregnancy:

1. It’s fine to be scared
The fact that you’re freaking out makes you human. It doesn’t matter if you’re 17, 27, or 37: an unplanned pregnancy is a shock. It’s also OK to be angry or sad. You might be sad for a version of your life that you’ll have to let go of. Know that no matter how you’re feeling, it’s okay. If you don’t allow yourself to feel these emotions now, they’ll eat you alive.

2. Nobody can tell you what to do
Lots of people might give you their opinions. But nobody can tell you how your decision will affect your life. No matter how many Google searches you do, it won’t predict your future. So try to cut through all the noise in your ears. Your heart knows which choice is best for you.

3. You’re not totally alone
Facing an unplanned pregnancy might make you feel alone, but that’s far from the truth. Nearly 50% of women in the U.S. will face an unplanned pregnancy by the time they’re 45 (source: the Guttmacher Institute). The reality is that there are tons of women who know how you feel because they’ve been there themselves.

4. Avoid using fear or anger to make a decision
While the emotions you’re feeling are real and OK, they might be getting in the way of your thinking. Once you’re calm, you’ll be best able to make a decision. Then, consider if the reason for your choice is love or fear.

5. Get a support system
This can be difficult to find, especially if you’re thinking about adoption. It will be an important part of moving forward. You might find a support system online if no one in your life has your back.

Lifetime has peer counselors that you can talk with. They’re women who’ve been where you are now and want to hear you out and give advice if you’re open to it. Just call us at 1-800-923-6784 if you’d like to talk or text with a birth mom.

6. You’re more than a statistic
Feeling ashamed, embarrassed, or even disappointed in yourself is normal. But we want you to know that you’re so much more than a just a statistic. An unplanned pregnancy doesn’t have to define you; it doesn’t make you stupid or irresponsible.

7. You can choose adoption anytime
You don’t have to make an adoption plan while you’re pregnant. Lifetime helps lots of women with adoption after their baby’s been born and when their child is a few years old. We’re not here to pressure you or rush you into a decision. Call Lifetime whenever you’re ready to learn more: 1-800-923-6784.

How To Get The Counseling You Need During Your Adoption Planning

There’s no doubt that creating an adoption plan for your baby is an emotional event. Every birth mother is going to experience the stages of grief differently. Know that it’s completely normal for you to wonder if this is the right decision, and to feel sad. Your emotions are normal and shouldn’t be discounted.

learn how to get no-cost counseling during your adoption planningWhat might help you is to talk to someone. Lifetime is happy to refer you to a licensed third-party counselor or to a peer counselor. Both types of counseling are provided to you free of charge. (By “peer counselor,” we mean a woman who’s gone through her own adoption planning and then placed her baby with adoptive parents.)

To help you process the grief you’re feeling, it’s important to take advantage of this free counseling. The counselor will help you cope with the grief, stress, and other emotions that come up during your adoption planning.

We’ll be up front: the process of grieving isn’t fun and it isn’t pretty. But working through these emotions now is the best way to get through this time in a healthy way. If you ignore how you’re feeling, it’ll just keep you from living a full, productive life.

You’re not alone with what you’re going through. There are millions of other women thinking about adoption and trying to process similar emotions. You’re able to talk to a licensed counselor AND a peer counselor right now and after your baby’s born.

With Lifetime, you’re able to speak honestly about the issues you’re facing as you get the help you need. Lifetime has a 24/7 adoption support phone number. If you’re more comfortable with texting, you can also use this number to text us.

Just give us a call or text us at 1-800-923-6784. We’re here to get you the help you need!

Modern Adoption vs. Safe Haven: How Do They Compare?

modern adoption or safe haven?Wondering what exactly is a “safe haven”? Safe Haven laws allow a parent give up their unwanted baby privately. With these laws, moms can drop their baby off at a safe haven location, as long as their baby hasn’t been abused. Safe Haven laws began so that babies wouldn’t be left in places like dumpsters or public toilets.

Regardless of what their life situation is like, a woman can make a private open adoption plan just as quickly and easily as she can drop off her baby at a safe haven. Just take a look at the benefits of creating an adoption plan instead of dropping off your baby at a Safe Haven:

  • Your baby won’t go into the crowded foster care system; they’ll be able to go home with a stable, loving adoptive couple of your choosing right away.
  • You’ll know what happened to your child (even if you end up choosing a closed adoption after placement.)
  • You can get access to no-cost counseling and support.
  • Adoption is free to choose, and it comes with no legal risks to you.
  • You can remain confidential with your situation
  • You’ll never be judged for making an adoption plan.
  • Adoption gives both you and your baby more stability and security in the long run.
  • If you choose open adoption, you’re able to stay in touch with your child and the adoptive family.

You can make an adoption plan for your baby at any time, even after they’re born. It’s never too late to choose adoption! Every child is wanted and adopt-able at Lifetime. To learn more about the advantages of modern adoption, just reach out to us.

Lifetime’s hotline is staffed 24 hours every day! You can call or send a text to 1-800-923-6784.

Adoption Truth: Guys Can Be Involved, Too

the adoption truth is, your guy can get involved in the adoption planning, too“My girlfriend is 25 weeks pregnant. We’re both 19, and just work part-time while we go to school. So I know there’s no way I could support a family right now. She thinks adoption is going to be best for our baby. She’s probably right, but I can’t just forget about my child. I need to stay a part of their life.”

Does your baby’s father want to remain a part of his child’s life after the adoption happens? Keep reading to learn how he can be a part of making an adoption plan, and why it’s good for him to get involved.

Modern, open adoption is getting to be more common and understood. And, more birth fathers are taking part in the adoption process. Usually, we find that when a birth father knows he has rights in open adoption too, he becomes supportive of the adoption plans.

Your baby’s father can help you pick your baby’s adoptive parents, come to know them, and help as you make the plan for on-going future contact.

Even if you decide not to stay in touch with your baby’s adoptive family after the adoption happens, he can still stay connected with his child’s adoptive family and his child. Many times a man may be more supportive of an adoption plan if he knows that he also can participate in the open adoption!

You can learn more about your guy’s involvement in adoption planning in this short video:

Adoption Truth – Birth Father and Open Adoption from Lifetime Adoption on Vimeo.

Do you have questions about your baby’s father and how he can get involved in the adoption? Lifetime Adoption Agency Florida is here to give you answers!

Just give us a call or text us at: 1-800-923-6784.

6 YouTube Channels for Women Thinking About Adoption

watching videos of birth mothers sharing their storiesWhen you’re thinking about adoption for your child, you’ll probably deal with a wide range of emotions. And, you’ll probably have lots of questions about what type of adoption is best for you. Know that Lifetime is just a phone call or text message away to answer your questions. You can reach us anytime, at
1-800-923-6784.

But, we realize too that sometimes you’re not ready to talk or text. When it comes to adoption, Youtube can be a great source of info. These 6 YouTube channels can give you encouragement, support, and info on what to expect as you go through the adoption process:

1. BraveLove hopes to change the way people think about adoption by producing honest and informative videos of birth mothers sharing their stories. Hear firsthand from women who chose a loving, eager adoptive family for their children.

2. Melissa Link: She’s a filmmaker and birth mother who created a documentary on her experience of placing her child for adoption. She shares about learning of her pregnancy, telling her family, and deciding on adoption. Her documentary has helped many birth mothers confirm that their adoption decision was the right one.

3. Beauty Amidst the Ashes: This channel’s goal is to educate people about adoption. They have tons of videos of birth mothers telling how their adoption process went and sharing their stories. These birth mothers come from many different backgrounds and situations and hope that their personal stories can encourage and support women thinking about adoption.

4. Lifetime: Our YouTube channel covers open adoption from every side, including yours. We have videos covering the adoption process from beginning to end, which can help answer any of your questions about the process. Make sure to check out the adoption videos that hopeful adoptive couples have made, too. Watching them is a great way to learn more about potential parents for your baby.

5. Mrs. Marshelle: She’s actually an adoptive mother, but she has some videos that’ll give you a peek into how an open adoption works in the real world. These videos feature her and her children visiting with their birth mothers.

6. Binti: This channel has interviews of birth mothers, which is great because you can learn from their experiences. Plus, you can learn about options you have with modern adoption that you maybe didn’t know existed! The birth mothers in Binti’s videos answer questions about a wide range of topics, from contact with the adoptive family to how involved the birth father is.

Lifetime Adoption Agency Florida is here to help you as you decide whether adoption’s the best choice for you.

Call or text us whenever you have questions or are ready to learn more: 1-800-923-6784.

Telling People You’re Pregnant

The shock has started to wear off. You’ve taken a minute (or two or even a week!) to think about what your pregnancy will mean. Maybe you’ve decided against abortion, and are stressed out about becoming a mom.

how to tell people about an unplanned pregnancyTons of questions pop up. Who can you tell? Who can help you through the next few months of your pregnancy? What will people say? Will they be happy for you or disappointed in you?

Some women feel relieved once they tell people they’re pregnant. Once you tell people about your pregnancy, you’ll get a wide variety of reactions. Everyone will probably have an opinion to share—whether it’s helpful or not.

The bottom line this: it’s your body, your baby, and your pregnancy. Yours to talk about, yours to experience, and yours to decide about. And after your pregnancy, the baby is yours. So the opinion that counts the most is your own.

This doesn’t mean you have to go through it all alone. Tell people who are going to have your back, even when they don’t agree with you. Tell those who love you, know you, and know your situation. Don’t be scared to share how you’re feeling. If you have someone there by your side, things might not seem as scary or overwhelming.

Would you like to talk about your pregnancy and how you feel about having a baby, but can’t find the words to tell your family or friends? Lifetime is familiar with unplanned pregnancies and the decisions that come with them. Reach out to our caring and compassionate coordinators by texting or calling us at 1-800-923-6784. We’re here to listen, not judge, and can help you find the words you need to tell your parents and your baby’s father. You’re not alone!

Is a Last-Minute Adoption Possible?

learn about your rights and choices in making a last-minute adoption planIf you know that adoption is the best choice for both you and your baby, then having an adoption plan in place before you go into labor is a good idea. But what if you don’t decide until really late in your pregnancy that adoption is best? Or what if you go into labor and then decide on adoption?

With Lifetime, you’re able to make an adoption plan at any time during your pregnancy. We’ve even had women call us from the hospital, in the early stages of labor! Adoption is always a possibility.

When you make a last-minute adoption plan, you still have the same rights and choices as you would if you’d done adoption earlier on. With modern open adoption, you choose the adoptive parents for your baby. An open adoption allows you to talk to and meet the adoptive parents. And, you’re able to stay in touch with the adoptive couple and your child in the future. Birth mothers we’ve worked with stay in contact in a wide variety of ways: through emails, photos, social media updates, phone calls, Skype, and in-person visits.

If you need help money-wise, the adoptive parents you choose can usually pay for your prenatal visits, hospital stay, and living expenses. You have the power to decide how things go at the hospital. What do we mean by this? Your hospital preferences can include stuff like:

  • Who you’re OK with being at the hospital when you deliver
  • Whether you want your baby in the room with you, or if you’d like him or her to stay in the nursery with the adoptive parents
  • If you want to stay in another area of the hospital after you deliver, away from Labor & Delivery
  • How much you want the adoptive parents to participate in the birth (for example, some women are fine with the adoptive mom being in Labor & Delivery. Or maybe you want them to stay in the waiting room)
  • If you’ll want the newborn pictures that are taken of your baby

No matter how early or late you are into your pregnancy, adoption is always a choice you can make. You can even choose adoption after your baby is born.

Lifetime Adoption Agency Florida is here to help you as you go through this decision. Call us whenever you have questions or are ready to learn more: 1-800-923-6784.

“How do I know my baby is going into a good home?”

get Lifetime's answer to the question '"How do I know my baby is going into a good home?'Question: “Right now, I’m 30 weeks pregnant, and I’m looking at adoptive families on your site. They all look friendly, and I like what they write, but how do I know my baby is going into a good home? How do I know the parents are good people?”

Answer: Lifetime Adoption Agency Florida is fully licensed and we do an in-depth screening of each of our adoptive families. That’s how we know that they’re financially secure and stable couples in a solid marriage. They’ve passed criminal background checks, have proven their income via tax records and payroll stubs, and have been declared healthy by doctor physicals.

Couples hoping to adopt also have to be asked lots of questions from a social worker, who visits their home to make sure it’s ready for a baby and to interview them. We do all of this so that you can be rest assured that the adoptive couples you see on our site are approved, screened, and questioned. They also attend adoption courses, so that they understand your need for future communication in what’s known as an “open adoption.”

When is it Too Early or Too Late to do Adoption?

Lifetime has been asked many different questions about when’s the right time to make an adoption plan. The truth is, it’s never too late or too early to look into adoption for your baby! Here are some answers to common questions women ask when they’re thinking about adoption early in their pregnancy as well as late in their pregnancy:
 
“I’m not that far along in my pregnancy – when can I choose adoption?”
 
“I’m not that far along in my pregnancy – when can I choose adoption?”If you’ve just learned that you’re pregnant or aren’t that far along, know that you can start the adoption process now. Most women aren’t 100% sure adoption is right for their situation when they call Lifetime. You don’t have to be committed to adoption before you contact us.
 
Contacting Lifetime early in your pregnancy gives you more time to learn about the adoption process, get emotional and financial support, and search for the right adoptive family for your baby. Contacting us doesn’t force you to choose adoption: you have the right to change your mind at any time until the legal paperwork has gone through.
 
“My due date is coming up quickly! – when is it too late to find adoptive parents for my baby?”
 
“My due date is coming up quickly! – when is it too late to find adoptive parents for my baby?”Choosing adoption isn’t an easy decision to arrive at. Some women don’t contact Lifetime to learn about adoption until the final weeks or days of their pregnancy. We have women call us from the hospital in the beginning stages of labor, more often than you’d think! If your due date is near, you might be wondering, “Is it too late to give my baby up for adoption?”
 
It’s never too late to choose adoption. You can even make an adoption plan after trying to parent your baby. Lifetime can help you begin the adoption quickly if that’s what you’d like. Within a matter of hours, we can have the adoptive parents you select there at the hospital waiting room while you deliver.
 
No matter how far along you are, you’ll have the chance to review and get to know a pre-screened adoptive couple. They’re ready and excited to commit to you and your baby. In many cases, the adoptive parents can cover your medical, counseling, and living costs.
 

Learn more about how to get started with your modern adoption plan by calling or texting Lifetime at 1-800-923-6784 today!